Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Let's Compare! A Christmas Checklist

So for some reason I feel very in control and unworried about this Christmas Season even though I have no presents under my tree. Last year felt wacky and wild so I have decided to compare Christmas 2010 to Christmas 2011.

Category 1- Out side holiday decorations:



One strand of lights, a Santa flag, no pumpkin but no picture.

Winner- 2011

Category 2- The Tree

2010- December 19th- Tree is in the house but no lights

2011- December 20th- Tree is up and decorated, but picture.

Winner- 2011

Category 3- Christmas Shopping

2010- The 23rd

2011- The 22nd

Winner- 2011

Category 4- December Blog Posts

2010- 5

2011- um counting this one? 1

Winner- 2010 (sorry)

So as you can see I am FAR better prepared this year than I was last year. Let's just overlook the fact I have no presents under the tree (or in my house for that matter).

Gabe on the other hand was NOT prepared to eat "Breakfast with Santa"

We ended up with a GREAT picture of Gabey with Santa...He just isn't actually on Santa's lap (or in the same room for that matter)

Look out for 2012 because the Squires may just have a tree up BEFORE the week of Christmas and Gabe may just sit in Santa's lap!

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

The End Of A Fairy Tale

So...Gabe has a special friend. Her name is Harper Katherine (Harper Kate Kate to those of us who love her). At about 8 months old their cribs were right next to each other and they loved to kiss through the bars. They find each other no matter what they are doing!

They like to get messy together.
They like to eat sand together.
They like to ride together.
They like to role play. Here they are doing a darn good impression of Bonnie and Clyde in time out on the wall. They had a child in between them pushing her back and forth back and forth! (I am channeling the "I'll Love You Forever book here...unfortunately they were not saying I'll like you for always or anything to that matter)

If you ask Gabe who his girlfriend is he replies quite happily "Harper Kate Kate".

That is until yesterday.

Yesterday they were playing with cars and Harper Kate Kate had one he wanted so he ever so gently reached over with his mouth and bit the first thing he could come into contact with...which happened to be her "private" (boobie).

She looked at Ms. Becki and said, "He is NOT my boyfriend anymore!"

I had high hopes.

I guess the romance was too good to let go. Christmas Parades can heal all wounds!

Monday, November 28, 2011

I Am Thankful! (For Four Day Weekends)

After last year's holiday confusion I decided to get a jump on holiday preparations this year...meaning I spent this four day weekend actually cleaning my house. I say this because I really feel like the delay last year was because the house was such a wreck I just could not bring myself to decorate it.

Or maybe I am just lazy.

Anyway, after a very disappointing Black Friday (on Thursday) experience (the short of it- Walmart, line, 7:30 PM, 10th in line for a PS3- they only had 9. The 20 year old guys in front of me buying it for themselves. Jerks. So irritated I can't write in complete sentences. The ONLY upside? GREAT COMPANY with my bestie Jiffiner) I couldn't bring myself to get into the Christmas Spirit. I moped around the house and unfortunately in moping I did a lot of looking down. AND when I looked down I unfortunately noticed how disgusting the house was.

AND you know me I can't do anything in a small way.

Instead of just cleaning I decided I needed to:
  • Clean out my junk room so Wil could have his own room.
  • Clean out a dresser so I could give it away.
  • Move Wil's bunkbed into the newly cleaned out junk room.
  • Wash all of my laundry (which consisted of, no lie, 53 loads)
  • Go through all of our clothes and get rid of everything that doesn't fit.
  • Move Gabe's bed into Noah's room (because Noah doesn't like to sleep by himself but he drives whoever is trying to sleep in the same room with him slap crazy)
  • Train Gabe to sleep in his own bed so Noah doesn't have to sleep alone.
  • Scrub the Koolaide stains off of my counter.
  • Wrangle all of Gabe's toys into one corner of our house.
  • Work on potty training.
  • Try to rid the bathroom of the remains of said potty training.
  • Grocery shop.
Pat on my back- I did all of those things. Wil got to sleep in his new room on Saturday night. Gabe spent all of Saturday night in his BIG BOY BED! Noah was so happy to have a new roommate. My closets are very nice looking and organized. I was a proud housewife and Momma!

For exactly one night.

Wil spilled red Koolaide all over the counter Sunday morning. Gabe peed right on the floor of the bathroom Sunday afternoon. Noah acted like a fool at church Sunday night. Wil decided the bunk bed was too hot for sleep and spent last night in Gabe's old room. Gabe decided he really liked mommy's bed better than his BIG BOY BED. Noah stayed up half the night because he had no one to sleep with him.

AND now I have exactly SIX loads of laundry waiting for me when I get home.

My children may end up sleeping in tents in the back yard.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Have You Tried The Chicken-In-A-Biscut Cracker Because I Am Thinking That May Be Easier

I have noticed lately that we have been going through an inordinate amount of chicken flavored Ramen Noodles. I didn't think too much about it because I figured that I since I now have a teenager and a tween (or as Wil likes to think...two teenagers who should be able to stay by themselves and walk downtown by themselves and hang out on his friend's boat with no parents by themselves) because when I was that age I was all about the Ramen noodles. (I actually thought I was pretty classy eating something from a different country- I lived a very sheltered chicken, rice and peas existence. I also thought bagels were high class since you could buy them on the street in New York.)

Anyway.... I noticed Noah opening a pack the other day and I watched with interest as he put the whole brick-o-noodles onto a plate. He opened the chicken flavor and sprinkled it onto the top, then picked up the whole thing and took a big old bite. Like he was biting into a piece of pizza. No bowl. No water. Not even a set of chopsticks. He looked at me and said...

"This a good cracker".

I don't even know what to say about that.

It reminds me of the other day when Gabey Baby was tapping very hard on my non-touchscreen Blackberry (that thankfully has not fallen off the top of any cars or taken any dives in the washing machine) and he looked at me with the most forlorn look and said

"My Ipod not working".

Why does my almost three year old know what an Ipod is but my 14 year old doesn't know Ramen Noodles are soup?

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Watch the Alpacas- They Spit

I went WAY out of my comfort zone yesterday and DROVE the bus for our field trip to Bee City...which my 4 year old friend Sam Brown pointed out really it wasn't much of a city since it had no towers (Tall buildings)-more like a farm. Driving a bus is not my idea of a fun field trip. Sitting on the back of the bus singing Sippin' Cider is way more up my alley! When I pulled back into town I realized my jaw was hurting because I had been clinching my teeth so hard. I had to take 4 motrin! I hope those kids appreciate those @#!* bees!

Just kidding.


Anyway, Bee City was so fun. We got to see a working hive (behind glass so no accidental stings). We could not find the queen...because really what 3 and 4 year old is going to look for more than 2.8 seconds for a queen bee? Maybe if it was a princess bee with a pink ball gown we could have feigned a little interest. Alas- no queen. We did however learn that all the girl bees are worker bees and the boy bees' only purpose in life is to go on dates with the queen and that they are the drones. I took this information home with me and have begun to refer to Charles as a drone. I am not sure how well our hive will produce honey since, as you well know, THERE ARE NO WORKERS BEES in this here hive!

We made many new friends at Bee City, which could technically be called Bee (Along With Some Marsupials, Farm Animals and Even a Couple of Gators and Prairie Dogs) City.  I was very tempted to bring home a Billie Goat (they were only $40.00 versus the $60.00 price tag of the Nanny Goat). The roosters were a steal @ $4.00 a piece but I am not sure how they would have made the bus ride. (Did I mention the bus ride?) My favorite by far was a very special animal. His (or her since I didn't check) beauty is beyond words. The sweet way it ate the feed from my hand and nudged me when it wanted more. I don't know why more of the children wouldn't feed him (or her).

Look at that smile. And the crooked head. Oh LOVE!

I will take him home and name him (or her) Fred.

Monday, October 31, 2011

Why I Should Not Put My Phone On Top Of A Car (or Why I Should Never Ask Wil To Load The Washing Machine Part II)

So I am phoneless again! I very brilliantly set the phone on top of the car while I buckled Gabe into his car seat. Then we drove off and heard the kerplunk. Unfortunately we didn't realize what the kerplunk was until we were in Charleston. By that time either the world's smartest raccoon had decided to start doing some Blackberry Messaging or some random jogger figured the could use a new phone. I am guessing at some point today I will call and report my own stupidity and pay the ridiculous deductible and get a new phone. Maybe God is telling me I don't need a Blackberry. Maybe he thinks I should upgrade to an Iphone. Just a guess on my part.

So onto my lack of a post last week. At least this time I had a good reason...

I tell you what, me and this hospital are getting to be on some bad terms! I honestly can't even tell you what went wrong. I walked down to Gabe's room at daycare and he was just a'fussin! It was a weird fuss so I knew something was wrong. I told him to walk with me and I took his temp and it was only 100.2. He climbed up on my couch and he started crying "my back, my back" like an 82 year old man. Now most two year olds do not complain about lower back pain so I made him an appointment at the pediatrician. I took his temp again before we left 102.1. Ooops!

We got to the pediatrician's office and he just went downhill from there. He couldn't go pee pee so they put a catheter in. Still no pee pee. So we got a nice little admit slip to go across the street and get a nice comfy bed and exactly no sleep.

I must admit I was a bit freaked out at this point because who really goes to the doctor and expects to be admitted to the hospital? I called Charles and asked him to meet me at the hospital. The conversation went like this...

Me: Gabe is getting admitted to the hospital can you meet me there?
Charles: Oh my goodness! Is he ok?
Me: Yes, but he really doesn't feel good and is having trouble going to the bathroom.
Charles: Well then can't you just get him in and I will be by in a little while?
Me: I need some help because I will have to get him registered.
Charles: Well how does everybody else get registered?
Me: Well everybody else may not have a sick baby when they register.
Charles: Rachel, everybody is sick when they register at the hospital.
Charles: Do you just want me to get you a good parking space since I am in my police car?
Me: Click.

He met me at the hospital. He just takes a little time to come around.


Monday, October 24, 2011

As Long As It Is Not A Double Barrel Shotgun Wedding....

Can you believe it has been a whole year since I wrote this? Yes, my Noah is now 14. For some reason it feels so much older than 13. 13 was a big change but Holy Smokes (or as Gabey Baby told me the other day..."Oh My Holy Cow"- I am not sure if holy as in Holy Cow should be capitalized but the way he said it leads me to believe it should be. And maybe even in a bold font) 14 is so very very different. 14 is almost driving age. 14 is almost dating age. 14 is one year closer to my being in an old folks home.

Anyway, I asked Noah what he wanted to do for his birthday. He piped up with the "I want to go to Aunt Anne's because she a redneck girl who cook good." So I called my sweet sister-in-law Anne and asked her if we could party down @ Chez Trezevant. She heartily agreed and told me to ask him what kind of cake he would like (because let's face it I don't do cakes). He said that he would like, not a chocolate cake, not a vanilla cake, not a confetti cake...he wanted a shotgun cake. Wait not just a shotgun cake...a double barrel shotgun cake. And Anne, being Anne, took the challenge and ran with it!
He really enjoyed his cake. Now since he is 14 and 14 year old boys are not the easiest things in the world to buy birthday presents for, Noah received quite a bit of cash. Here is where I need to take this blog and make a very serious confession. When my children get birthday money (or Christmas money or Easter money or Halloween money for that matter) they put it up in a safe place and try to save it. AND then they want McDonalds or Wendy's or (my favorite) Chik-Fil-A and they bug me and bug me and I have no cash so of course I just take their birthday (or Christmas or Easter or Halloween) money and take them to wherever they want to go. My name is Rachel and I take my children's money. I feel better now (not really).

So after 14 years Noah has caught onto this and he gave his money to his brother (who he had just gotten into a fist fight with) for safe keeping. Wil is better at hiding things than Noah so I guess we will not be going to Chik-Fil-A until payday.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

A Day in the Life...

I have been snapping a lot of grainy cell phone pictures of Gabey Baby these day.I thought I would put together a little show for you so you can see (and maybe take notes on) what a great mother I am. We usually start the day like this....

As you may remember (because of that dang owl) Gabe has been sleeping in our bed. I know, I know! Oh the shame of it. I will admit it is easier and let's just admit... I am all about the easy.

We go to school and work and sometimes we get to take great little fields trips this one to the pumpkin patch

Ok I take no credit for this since it is obviously not a grainy cell phone picture! Thanks Suszanne for taking this!

When it is raining we like to jump in puddles...

That second shot reminds me of some of the better Big Foot shots I have seen. Not that Gabey Baby has a big foot.

When we get home we usually have more than a few of these...

Oh ow I love temper tantrums. They make my life complete.

Every once in a while we will do something fun at night...

He loved his first football game AND he loves his Ya-Ya! (Laura is my next door neighbor who I have turned into my personal nanny. God love her! I could never make it without her!)

And then of course, because I am who I am, we ALWAYS push it too far and do things like go to IHOP after the football game. Who doesn't take their 2 year old for pancakes at midnight?

AND then we start all over again!

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Nyquil (I Mean Calgon)-Take Me Away

Have you ever had one of those months nights when nothing seems to go your way? Last night was one of those nights for me. It started with Noah and this...

Just so you know he thought he saw a fire. On the concrete floor. Under the steel stairwell. I am going to get his eyes rechecked along with the hearing next time. 

Then, as if the fire wasn't enough... I forgot to leave Gabe's bag in the nursery. AND if you recall we are in the deep and dark depths of potty training. Um yeah. He pooped in his pants. AND no one could find me to tell me so those poor nursery helpers (shout out to ya Jeff and Candi) had to deal with it. At least they didn't have a Walmart bag with a hole in it.

After I got Gabe all ready to go home I turn around and see two more mischievous Squires' boys followed by an angry Royal Ambassador teacher. The look on his face should have been enough to send a blood clot straight to my brain. He said, in his deep voice..."Rachel I need to talk with you". I looked from Wil to Heyward and then to Gabe. Then I looked at Gabe's diaper bag and thought about those poopy underpants (and pants and socks and shoes) and asked that deep voiced Royal Ambassador teacher if he could possibly just call me because if he couldn't tell I was on the verge of a very large breakdown. (FYI I haven't gotten my call yet and honestly I still can't promise there won't be a coronary).

I got four of the five Squires' loaded into the car (plus a friend-who I will add was quite well behaved) and looked around for the fifth. Yeah NOWHERE to be found. Did you even need to guess? I screamed across the parking lot when I saw his little pop out of the door and then try to sneak back in and thoroughly humiliated myself. 
I got home and the artist formerly known as Gabe drew this for me...
on the kitchen floor...with a Sharpie. And I might add that he is a performance artist...he did it in the nude.

The last straw came when I did this...

That is a cup full of chocolate milk. You can't really tell but the majority ended up in between the counter and the stove. Just where you want all of your chocolate milk to end up.

I gave up and climbed into bed and turned on a rerun of Dance Moms to make the world go away. If you have never watched Dance Moms (and why you haven't is beyond me because it is trashy TV greatness) you may not know but the teacher ranks all of the girls in a pyramid every week with the best on the top of the pyramid on the top and the rest dwindling down below her. SO I have decided to do my own pyramid...

As you can see my pyramid is not based on who was the best performer of the night...more like who was in the most trouble.

Friday, September 30, 2011

A Better Man

So BIG news! My eleven year old has a (shh don't tell him I told you) girlfriend. We will call her Sally. Now, Wil and Sally have gone to school together since 3rd grade. So imagine my surprise when he informed me that he and Sally had decided to "go out". I wondered aloud how this happened and he told me "Oh Jada hooked us up". (Jada is a good friend who rides home with us most days of the week and they have LOTS of time to talk about things such as "going out") Then I asked him what did "going out" in the sixth grade look like. His response? "Oh we just kinda hang out in the courtyard at lunch". I asked him what they did before they started going out. "Mom! We still just hung out in the courtyard together!" I am so glad that is cleared up for me. I wonder what is going to happen to the courtyard hang out when they break up.

Jada told me that she and Wil had a long conversation about Sally in the library yesterday. This was the conversation (and I SOOO wish I could have been there)

Wil: You know Jada, Sally has made me a better man.
Jada: How so Wil?
Wil: Well before Sally I just stood under the water in the shower and now I actually use the soap.

I always wondered why I never needed to buy shampoo.

So dear Sally... thanks for opening up my child eyes to wonder of hygiene. I hope he wears deodorant in the courtyard on the hot days.

And just for all of you who can't make it to the BCOB/LCCC production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat here is a preview of the "Hairy Ishmaelites"   AKA Wil, Pheobe, Lydia and Christy. They could use a little soap themselves.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

So This Potty Training Thing is Going to Get Easier...Right?

I know it has been a while since I went through this whole potty training ordeal with Noah and Wil. I didn't think I had forgotten the horror of the accidents. Apparently, as in child birth, my brain has decided to block certain aspects of the intense pain smelly remains of the potty training deal. OR maybe it is the fact that Sweet Gabey Baby may indeed be just a tad bit spoiled. (I know that if his teachers hear me say "He's my last baby" one more time they will revolt and kick him out of the older two year old's class and put him right back in the "He is really an older two but his mommy treats him like a baby so he is spoiled rotten" younger two year old class) He has decided that it is just way easier to have mommy and his teachers change his whole outfit than to stop what he is doing and go potty.

At one point the other night (after a particularly terrible day at work that I am just now able to talk about) I had changed so many pairs of Nemo, Thomas and Lightning McQueen underpants that I gave up and let him just wear a pair of pajama bottoms. AND it was in that time frame he decided that pee pee wasn't the only thing that didn't need to go into the toilet. It only got better when I picked the Walmart bag with THE HUGE HOLE in it to put the mess into. Now cleaning it up once is bad enough...but twice is when I give up for the night...put the child back into a pull-up and make cinnamon rolls for dinner.

Last night when I was packing his bag for school today I asked which underpants he wanted to which he replied..."I just want the diaper".

I may have hit my limit. I can only hope he doesn't go to college in a diaper.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

My Name Is Rachel and I am a Monopoly Addict

Well it has been a while since we have gotten down to a juicy post. I have excuses...however, none of them are any good. I will say that after the whole phone washing incident and the following years months weeks of isolation I have a new found respect for the people who can't sit at a stop light without checking their facebook. I felt like my left arm was gone. Actually I would probably miss my left arm less than I did my Blackberry.

Ok maybe that is a stretch and I certainly mean no disrespect to my fellow left armless friends out there.

Anyway all that is to say it took a while to recover from the depression following the phone withdrawals. Noah downloaded Monopoly to my new phone and I cannot seem to break myself away from it. Right now I am in the middle of a match with Wheelbarrow- Racecar and Battleship have gone bankrupt and since I have $163,000 and Wheelbarrow has $25,000 and we both have tons of hotels I just don't think it is ever going to end. It truly is the never ending monopoly game. AND that folks is about as sporty as I get.

Things are moving right along with the Squires boys. Middle school is slowly killing us. Well, actually not so slowly. Wil made it exactly 3 weeks before he lost his agenda. It was 2 weeks before Noah wouldn't get out of the car because he forgot to use the bathroom before he left home and to quote him "I can't use that bathroom cause that bathroom have germ and that germ make me sick and if I sick I can't go to school so I need go home to go bathroom cause our bathroom have our germ and I already have our germ and our germ not make me sick so take me home". Does that make you as tired as it makes me?

Gabey Baby is in the middle of potty training which means FUN TIMES! His favorite line is "I don't hava go right now" and then exactly 38 seconds later he has an accident. Can I just say I have found the reason that toddler boxers are not the preferred choice of potty training mothers. They don't seem to hold in quite as much as the tighty whities. He has also added his own sound effects to everything he does. If I do say so myself he is extra talented when it comes to shooting laser sounds. He is all boy...until you ask him what his favorite toy is. Just in case you are wondering it is his purse. It is very beautiful. Black with pink and blue designs on it. He puts cars in it and throws any of the other boys to the ground who try to steal it from him. The girls in the class could care less about it. They would much rather play with the dump truck than the purse. 

Baby Olivia is a joy. She is so beautiful and sweet and good. You could take all of the sweetness from all of our boys and Olivia has more! I can't believe what a difference a girl makes.

I have so much to share but all of my creative juices have been sucked up by this never ending monopoly game. Someone please help me.

Friday, August 19, 2011

Why I Should Never Ask Wil to Load the Washing Machine

I have been crying since I got to work. And if someone comes and asks me what is wrong...I start crying again. I know I should be writing a post about how great the kids are doing on their first week back at school but alas...I am lamenting over the fact that my best friend is no longer with me. My Blackberry has pass away (as Noah would say because he thinks dead is a mean word) AND can I just say that it all comes back to the freaking laundry? I swear I am going to move to a commune and go naked forever because I HATE LAUNDRY! Since the laundry fairies came and washed every stitch of my clothes while I was away at Passportkids! this summer I have been under pressure to stay on top of it and not allow more than one hamper to become full. The pressure I tell you! I asked Wil to throw the clothes into the washer last night because heaven forbid they were beginning to pile up. He did and I started the washer and it wasn't until a the complete wash and spin cycle finished before I realized my phone was GONE!

To top it all off when I called this morning it is the only phone on my plan without insurance. Great! Have I mentioned the other two phones on my plan are lost in the woods thanks to my children?

So world- as the global markets fall apart and children are starving in the Sudan- my Blackberry is gone.

At least it smells April Fresh. Thanks Tide with a touch of Downy.

Monday, August 1, 2011

I Know What I Did This Summer

Well, I know what I did this summer right now but come September I may very well have forgotten every bit of it SOOOO.... how about a little visual reminder in the form of grainy pictures from my cell phone? I know you all are on the edge of your seats wanting to know what exactly has kept me from my bloggy adventures so I give you the 2011 equivalent of the really boring slide show your grandparents would show after they got back from their yearly trip to see the leaves change color.

Starting with the most important and most not boring thing of the summer! And that is...

Olivia Anne Trezevant
And can I just point out that she is a girl? I know at times I overstate the obvious but I really think it needs to be reiterated that she is a precious pink little girl and she is part of MY FAMILY! I could not be any more excited! We love her and we love her mommy and her brother and I guess her father too!

Next up on the list is our annual River-Rat reunion. I will spare you the pictures of the adult river rats because let's face it- fat, white rats are not very attractive but little brown ones are cute as can be!

FYI my big boys skipped the river-rat party this year and thus accounts for the van having about 3 gallons less of pluff mud this year. Also the sand and dirt factors went way down. 

Next on our exciting summer journey (for real cause we had lots of fun and I am almost ready to sell my car and move to Daufuskie- all except the whole no fast food on the island detail and also the no grocery store because my children would eat up all of the food in the house and then I would have nowhere to go and get more that did not involve a 30 minute boat ride. Just me a diva. Oh and also the fact that it would probably cost a million to move there and I have exactly $19.34 to my name right now)

Our Very Hard Work

Our Excitement

Our Transportation

Our Very Historically Accurate Tour Led by DJ and Myself

Next stop on our summer tour takes place on top of a shrimp boat because isn't that where all great adventures begin? I foresee our next 8 birthday parties taking place on a chartered shrimp boat!

We also hung around the house and town some...
Looking for shark's teeth

Playing a little ball


Hanging out at the Drive-In (and stranded a fool. What will they say Mon-day at school

There is much much more to our summer adventures but I am not sure ya'll can stand the excitement. As you can see we have had a lot going on SOOO can you please excuse my lack of interesting reading if I promise to fill you in on all of my school shopping and last minute summer reading? I promise to make it worth your while (or not).

Monday, July 18, 2011

Halloween and the Red Oompa Lumpas

First of all welcome back! Sorry I have been such a terrible blogger lately! I have had so much going on that I have not been able to keep up my bathing schedule much less turning my mundane life into something that would interest even a prisoner who had been in solitary for the past 53 years. Today was the last of some serious inspections at work so I can lean back and relax a little BUT not too much because now we are on a mission to stay on budget for the month.

When I was growing up Halloween was a big deal. None of this "Devil's Holiday" stuff... It was dress up in a plastic outfit and put on a plastic mask that NEVER fits over your nostrils and get candy. Well for most people! Amy's birthday is November 1st so we had many a costume party at our house. The plastic outfit and the ill fitting nostrils never found their way into the little house in Shell Point. (Oh but I did want a Little Orphan Annie costume really really bad) Clowns and ballarinas, little black cat and hobos-you name it and I got to be it!

My mom was a Pro-fessional! The bain of her Halloween existence? The grease paint makeup. My mother has never worn makeup. Maybe a little blush here and there although I bet if you looked in her medicine cabinet you would find the green and blue eye shadow that she wore in 1969 when she hooked that skinny studmuffin with the killer sideburns. I digress, since she never  wore makeup she never had makeup suitable for a clown (or a hobo for that matter) and the grease paint would melt off of our faces about three minutes after we left the house. Her solution? Koolaide. It left mustaches on our faces so why not? She'd mix up a little koolaide paste and go to town. (Now I did still have clown cheeks one Thanksgiving but that is beside the point) It was brilliant! Her friends marveled at her cleverness and I still have a very nice plaque from the town costume contest (and dents in my head from the wire coat hangers she stuffed into my pig tail braids to make them look like Pippy Longstocking-again I digress).

I am taking this trip down memory lane tonight because Eleita's grandsons have decided to follow in the grand koolaide tradition. A nice paste you may be thinking. Um no. These are The Squires Boys...think a little larger. I will give you a little hint...

Oh yes that is a bathtub full of koolaide. And please note the toilet also has it's fair share in there. I wish I could have posted better pictures because many MANY parts of them are now red but I do believe that my blog would be removed because of inappropriate subject matter. BUT PLEASE... use your imaginations. Gabe and Heyward look like red Oompa Lumpas and Noah somehow resembles one of those rare red monkeys I used to see on Mutual of Omaha. Who knows maybe they are not so rare anymore.
So for future reference...

Koolaide for drinking? Yes
Koolaide for mustaches? Yes
Koolaide for clown makeup? Yes
Koolaide for bathing? Please download above picture for a reminder...NO!